Almost LOL's tips on Life

If your internet speed at home is slow, you can always munch something till the page loads - all in all, you will end up increasing the number of bytes per second!
***

If you are to work late into the night filling up an Excel sheet, to ensure you can last longer at the task, always use Dura-cell!
***

Sometimes, friends can be very inconsiderate about your deep felt emotions -
Chauhan: "I just looooooove nature."
Me: "Is that why you get so many calls?"

A High Level PJ

At the Archi@Mumbai meet few days back, Thando was recounting his recent pilgrimage trip to the Himalayas -
Thando: "Yar, jahan gaye the wo 6,800m ki unchai par to hogi!"
Sivvam: "Wahan par saas lene mein dikkat nai hoti?"
Me: "Tirth yatra par log in-laws ko lekar to jate hi hain."
Thando: (Ignoring me) "Par daudne se Oxygen nai mil pata hai."
Me: "Kyun? Tum daude to Oxygen peeche reh gaya?"

Piano Chips

Keyboardists in my hostel have been similar in their eccentricities wherever they go - As you read, two of them are busy making Chips! Cherry, at Synopsys, Bangalore is using Silicon while SidsVash, at ITC, Pune is making them out of Potatoes!! Boingggg!!

Drinks Anyone?

When the ETDS group met to bid farewell to the passing out batch, the smallest of the ex-governors said that she had booze in her room, which was received with great appreciation. While people made plans how to go about drinking, she also mentioned that she had some Gin. Amidst more plans on how to finish that, I inquired how feasible it would be, as wouldn't one first have to rub the contents out of it?

The Road did it

While cycling back to campus from the station one Saturday afternoon, I found the road blocked for some re-tarring work going on. There were Road Rollers and all other necessary machinery.
I reached my wing, knocked on a door, and told the occupant: "I saw the most amazing thing so far in Kgp!"
"What?"
"The road was getting laid."

A Sequel to the Trilogy

DC to me: "Have you seen 'Across the Universe'?"
Me: "I can't see that far!"
Amit: "I didn't understand!"


* * *


In order to understand better what was taught in the Class of Architectural Conservation, we went to have lunch at Heritage A/C Restaurant.

* * *

At the Hall Farewell, Bhandari to me (bohot sento ke saath): "Praddy aap chale jaoge, mere se ek bite ice-cream to kha lo <puppy-dog-face>!!"
I took a bite, and asked: "So, how many Gb are you now left with?"

A Trilogy

What did the Umpire say over the walkie talkie when the batsman was out on the last ball of the over?
"Over and Out!"


* * *

A senior in the Hardware team in the Hall was explaining how too many dangling wires increase the chance of a short circuit.
I cut him short with the observation that the wires were too long already.


* * *

Two of my friends were arguing whether black chicks were hotter than white chicks.
They had nothing else to say when I pointed out that chicks were usually yellow.

Howzzat!!

It was the end-of-year Hall Music team treat where my humble suggestion earned me a GPL!
As per "tradition", the freshers in the team had to get drunk, and no amount of alcohol seemed to having any effect. Frustrated, someone (probably DC) exclaimed: "Sala ye log to out hi nai ho rahe!"
To which I offered: "Let's play cricket!"

One Moment Please

This is probably the earliest of my PJ's that I can remember.

We had just given our Mechanics Class Test. Cycling up the road, I spotted two of my fellow ETDS members walking just ahead. I promptly got off my cycle and began to tag along. Now how was I supposed to know that Kedia wated to ask Hardii out!!

Amidst some small talk, we reached the intersection, when Hardi asked me: "Umm... Praddy, could you please give us a moment?"

My reply was as innocent as: "Sure, but about which axis?"

...

Definitions were never the same again. Today, a Couple is that which asks for a Moment.

Introduction

Hello dear unfortunate reader. As this is the first post, I am keeping it simple. Hope you survive the ordeal that I shall put you through!!
:P